We all have to-do lists (Affiliate Link), from grocery shopping to back-to-school activities. While these lists are wonderful and helpful. it is possible that some of the tasks on the list do not need to be completed. If you are ready to see what you don’t need to do, today’s challenge is for you. The not-to-do list challenge will help you distinguish the importance of what is a priority and what is a nice to have or do task. Let’s dive right in and start.
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Determining Your Priorities
To determine your priority, you need to know your values and what you are passionate about. Answer these questions to help you determine your priorities.
- What type of life do I want to live?
- What do I believe in?
- The most important things in my life are ....
- What do I stand for?
- What do I look forward to each day?
- If I had two hours to do something, what would that something be?
- Do I love what I do in my job?
- What do you think about first thing in the morning and last thing in the evening?
Look for things that are not external rewards like money, status, and approval of others to help you answer these questions.
Now that you have an idea of your values. Some tasks you have gotten in the habit of doing may need to be examined and removed. Now, let’s determine the tasks to assess.
Reasons You May Do Unnecessary Tasks
Not all tasks need to be done right now, tomorrow, or ever. Sometimes these tasks were instilled in us because of thoughts and feelings that we created or that were told to us. Below are some reasons we have tasks that we added to our to-do list.
- We had something happen to us in the past and don’t want to repeat the mistake.
- It could have been a saying we heard that we felt was valid, so we took it on as a task.
- It may have been a task instilled in our parents that we felt was important.
- We may have seen something traumatic that we didn't want to happen to us, so we added some tasks to minimize that possibility.
While these are only a few reasons, you may find others while examining your values. Make a note of them as well to help you determine a pattern of behavior.
When assessing these reasons for why you have done tasks, you may find that some tasks can be removed or greatly reduced in size to fit better into your day.
The Not-To-Do List Challenge
Now it’s time for the Not-To-Do List challenge. Below are the steps.
Create a Done List.
First, jot down all the things you have done for one week. If you want to do it longer than a week, that works too. Be sure to include everything! This includes watching TV, TikTok, or YouTube, going to the grocery store, spending time reading, reading with your kids, etc…
If you write in a planner already and have all these tasks written down, place that planner near you to review your prior weeks.
Analyze the Done List.
Now, for each done task on your list, draw a happy face =) for tasks that make you feel good, completed, or satisfied. Or a sad face =( for a task that makes you feel sad, mad, or angry after completing it. Write down one or two words that give you more context for these feelings.
Determine What to Add to your Not-To-Do-List Questions
Then, review the happy and sad face tasks. Answer the questions below on a separate sheet of paper.
- What tasks frustrated me after I finished it?
- Were there tasks that distracted me from my goals?
- Does this task contribute to my overall well-being?
- What tasks stressed me out?
- Does this task foster my values?
- Is the task exhausting me?
- Did I feel obligated to do this task?
- Is this task in my control to do?
- What is the outcome if I do this task?
- Does this task take me one step closer to my goal?
- Is this something that distracts me but doesn’t deter me from finishing a task?
Take time to examine your answers while reviewing your done tasks. Depending on your answers, any tasks that seem to sway you from your values and goals you have for your day, week, or month may be tasks you can add to your not-to-do list. Write these tasks on another piece of paper labeled Not-To-Do List.
Pick three tasks from the not-to-do list
Now pick three tasks that will become your not-to-do list. Write them down on sticky notes (Affiliate Link) and create recurring reminders on your devices to help you remember what not to do. Below are some examples of not to do list (Affiliate Link) tasks you may want to include.
Not-To-Do List Examples
Below I compiled a list of tasks you don’t need to do. These not to do list tasks are ones you may do sometimes but not all the time.
Workout:
This one can become a habit very easily, doing it day in and day out. But, if you have an injury that needs healing, it may not be easy to stop. So, you may be obligated to shorten your healing time and, as a result, injure yourself more.
Fasting:
The new trend is too fast, especially as you get older. But jumping in with two feet and doing a long and intense fast may not be your best option. First, it may not be right for you and your situation. Just because it is trendy and EVERYONE seems to be doing it doesn’t mean you have to.
Kids activities:
Not all kids need to be enrolled in every after-school activity. Some may do better just being in one or two each season. Some kids may not need to be involved in any activity because they prefer to do something else instead.
Clean the house:
Cleaning the house is nice to do, but does it have to be you that does it? I had to grapple with this issue some years ago after a back injury. I realized that spending the money for my house to be cleaned was money well spent because I didn’t have to deal with 2 to 3 days of back issues after I did the task. And, while my husband and kids don’t like people coming in and cleaning while they are home, I have stood my ground and said to them. If you don’t want a cleaning service, you ALL must clean the house instead. That keeps them quiet for a few months. lol
Streaming videos on YouTube/Instagram/TikTok:
This can be a big one for many people. They may watch these videos to unwind at the end of the day. But, maybe there is something that is better to do, like take a walk or hike.
Playing video games:
While playing games is entertaining and can even be social. Actually, going out and meeting people may be even better for your well-being.
Some other not-to-do tasks could be not answering unknown numbers. Not accepting emails after work hours. Only accepting meetings that have a clear objective. Not accepting unclear end-time meetings with colleagues.
When you have fully memorized and have implemented not doing these three not-to-do tasks, do this process again and pick three more not-to-do tasks to minimize even more of your daily activities. This challenge is an ongoing process that will allow you the time to discern what you want in your simplified life and what you do not. Returning to this challenge a few times a year will allow you to get to a more productive life without stressing over it. I hope this challenge motivates you to
Now it’s your turn! What is on your not-to-do list? Was this challenge helpful to jumpstart your list? Please leave a comment below. I would love to hear from you.
How can I help you? If you are looking to be more accountable in your business or personal life, feel free to check out my virtual organizing consultation services or my micro business owners' virtual consults.
Hazel Thornton says
Great idea to frame this as a challenge and provide lists of questions to help analyze your priorities. And thanks for pointing out that its an ongoing process!
Sabrina Quairoli says
Thanks for stopping by and joining in the conversation, Hazel! =)
Julie Bestry says
I love that you make the point about doing tasks because we felt obligated (like something instilled in us by our parents). This is one of the reasons why I think SMART goals should be SMARTY goals, with the Y for your. So freakin' much that people do is done because of they assume obligations that they could (with a little effort) cast off because they don't fit them.
And I am so impressed with your analysis process for the DONE list. First, if people realized how much they've accomplished rather than focusing on what they didn't get done, they'd feel proud instead of demoralized. Second, your questions and prompts are so insightful! (Though I'm giggling at "fasting" being on the not-to-do list; I know you mean like intermittent fasting/dietary fasting, but with Yom Kippur fast from Sunday at sundown to sundown on Monday, it's timely. Even our faith says that if it's not good for your health situation, don't do it!)
I'm looking forward to analyzing my list and seeing what to jettison!
Sabrina Quairoli says
Thanks, Julie! I totally agree! Thanks for sharing the Yom Kippur fast information. People forget to listen to their intuition or inner knowledge. Sometimes more well-educated individuals do not know better than we do for our own wellbeing.
Seana Turner says
Very thought-provoking Sabrina!
I am a creature of habit, and so I find that I am doing some things simply because I started them at some point in the past, and then I kept going. I also have some "not to do" items that tend to be things that are easy, mindless, etc. These "low barrier to entry" tasks may not be what is most important, but they give me a (false) sense of being productive.
I think that first list of questions will make for interesting dinner conversation. I plan to bring it up tonight!
Sabrina Quairoli says
That's wonderful, Seana!
Linda Samuels says
This is so funny. We both wrote and thought about lists this week- your "Not-To-Do List" and my "Just Be List." I love your approach to finding what to include on the not-doing list.
Time goes. And without an awareness of how and where we spend our time, it's hard to figure out what we want to do or NOT do.
When something repeatedly pops up on my to-do list, and I keep postponing it, there's a good chance I don't need or want to do it. I use that cue as an indicator. When I recognize that is the case, I delete the task. The reality is we can't do everything. So, being intentional about what we want to accomplish or can let go of is essential.
Sabrina Quairoli says
I agree! Being intentional is essential to living your life to its fullest.
Diane N Quintana says
It sometimes amazes me the things we do without thinking because of a preconceived notion or a thought our parents/grandparents left in our brain. I like the questions you ask and how you systematically ask people to evaluate how they feel about the things they have done.
Sabrina Quairoli says
Thanks, Diane! It was a fun post to write while on vacation. =)
Kim says
Some really good ideas here and a good exercise to jot down all the things. The question that is for me is "Were there tasks that distracted me from my goals?" I find myself sitting down to write and then checking Facebook, linkedIn and Instagram, etc. because there are notification or I think about something else that needs to get done.
Sabrina Quairoli says
I'm right there with you, Kim. Sometimes the thought of writing, makes me want to create other things to do.
Janet Barclay says
Great examples! And I especially like your recommendation to only stop doing three things at a time. The more we try to do (or not do) at once, the more likely we are to get overwhelmed and fall back into our old routines.